So do I sit with the Dads or the Moms? Some antenatal hilariousness, by The Other Mommy

So being the “Other Mommy” of Little Spot has had some fun moments already. I am clearly not growing a baby in my belly but I am mentally preparing for becoming a Mom. It’s surreal to say the least but I am amazed at this little being already, and so damn grateful to Barbs for everything she has done to get us so close to becoming a family of three. EEEEKKKK! Ok just breathe.

They tell you that in antenatal classes… just breathe. Everything will be fine. We had some interesting moments getting the baby in, and now it seems we will have even more fun getting the baby out.

At our first every antenatal class, having arrived all bright-eyed and ready to learn about our darling bundle of joy, we took turns introducing ourselves as couples and parents-to-be. The very excited dad in the front row introduced himself and his wife, the nervous couple in the back did the same, followed by the couple sitting next to us – who had definitely not figured us out yet. When Barbs introduced me as her wife and the dad from the next door couple’s eyes just got bigger and bigger. I’m pretty sure he was thinking, “so how did they actually get the baby in there??? And they are both girls – how on earth did they possibly make a boy???” Mind absolutely blown.

The following antenatal class was a lesson on exercises for the moms-to-be to keep the muscles supple and strong. The midwife asked all the dads to go and wait outside while the moms did their exercises. So where should I go – outside with the dads (probably to talk about rugby and how glad they are that they don’t have to do exercises – sounds rad) or stay with the moms? The midwife said I should stay with the moms. OK cool, she knows way more than I do, so I better listen and stay with the moms. The pilates lady came in and did a little intro to all the moms-to-be and kinda looked at me suspiciously as if to say, “lady, I can see you’re not pregnant, what are you doing here?” And probably thinking, “shame maybe she’s a bit cuckoo and thinks she’s pregnant… let’s leave her alone and help her with her fake preggie exercises.” So there I was, in amongst all these preggie bellies learning to control my pelvic floor muscles, stretch my abdomen, hold the muscles around the baby and of course… breathe. And try not to look at Barbs too much because I’ll definitely laugh.

The lesson ended with the obligatory, awful natural birthing video, made in the 90’s, complete with a perm. The man next to us (who after two weeks still hadn’t quite figured out how we got this right) was turning more and more green as the video went on. When the placenta made its appearance he said loudly “WHAT is THAT?!?!” He and his wife didn’t arrive at last night’s class, I think the whole thing was just too much for him.

As we learn more about this little bundle we are going to look after ALL OUR LIVES (showee about that breathing thing) I can’t help feel that we are the luckiest people in the whole world! The wonders of the 21st century and modern medicine have helped us to become what all little girls dream of – a Mommy. Well not yet, 3 months to go and I’m sure more fun and games with antenatal class on the way soon!

2 thoughts on “So do I sit with the Dads or the Moms? Some antenatal hilariousness, by The Other Mommy

  1. Pingback: Amateur Mommies

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